Somebody forwarded this email to me earlier today (subject: “untuk menceriakan hari anda”). This email is supposed to be written by a high-ranking government officer in charge of international protocol in an unspecified ministry.
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Dear [redacted],
With refer to the above mention.
2. For your information, [redacted] is making preparation on receiving your delegation from [redacted]. It would be grateful if you could insist me on providing the following information:
i) Confirmed delegation name that will be arriving in Malaysia;
ii) Any special dietary among the delegation so we could make special arrangement on food and beverages;
iii) Contact person of the secretariat that could be reach in Malaysia; and
iv) Car/ MPV plate number for parking purposes.
3. Kindly revert back to me by today for immediate action and if there’s any inquiries, please do not hesitate to call the below signage.
Thank you & Salam mesra
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Oh my god. I don’t even know where to start.
“With refer to the above mention” ??????? mana belajar English ni? Nigeria ke?
“It would be grateful if you could insist me on providing the following information”. It would be great, not “grateful”, if you could string words together better than a four year old. “if you could insist me…”???? Damn…”assist” lah bahlul
“Confirmed delegation name…”. The name of the delegation or the names of the members of the delegation? Sounds like the first one, since “name” is in singular.
“Any special dietary among the delegation…”. A minor point, but i would put “requirements” after “dietary”.
“Car/ MPV plate number”. Again, no big deal, but it is better to use “registration number” when referring to the number on the car plate, especially for international correspondence.
“please do not hesitate to call the below signage“ MUAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA…this, i tell you, is a great MONEY SHOT. Just when you think it couldn’t be worse, then along comes “below signage“….HADUII WAKAKAKKAKAA apsal tak signpost atau signboard, ke alang2 tu sign language terus…MAK AIII WEKEKEKKEKEKEE…what a glorious ending to an epic failure.
I know it’s lowbrow to pick on grammar, but seriously people, if you are representing the GOVERNMENT OF MALAYSIA and you are in charge of INTERNATIONAL PROTOCOL, writing an official letter to a FOREIGN GOVERNMENT, at least try to write a fucking letter that doesn’t look like it is written by an idiot.
Adeh….camne la boleh jadi in charge international protocol nih…mesti kuat kipas udang buntut bos nih. Hadui takkan la basic competency in English dah tak jadi requirement untuk berurusan dengan kerajaan luar. Buat malu jer, hishhh…
I hereby offer my service to representatives of ministries, government agencies, and statutory bodies in Malaysia: to proofread and edit your letters for international correspondence, before you seal the envelope or click “Send” and further embarass the Malaysian Government. It would take me 10 minutes, 15 minutes tops, to read your letter and suggest changes. I won’t guarantee the letter will be perfect, but at least it won’t sound retarded. Price negotiable. If interested, please contact the BELOW SIGNAGE, or if you prefer, the undersigned.
Signed,
-suhaimi-
Hahaha … mesti mamat ni cut n paste email/surat terdahulu. Itu pasal bunyinya kelakar… tapi kalau kita tengok choice of words diorang … kadang2 nampak macam desperate nak tunjuk high-level vocabulary .. kunun2 business language ler .. kih kih kih …
29 Oct 09 at 8:36 am #hehe betul ke ape yang kau dapat kat email ni bal? these day banyak tul phoney kat forwarded email. tapi kalau it’s real, wtf!!
29 Oct 09 at 1:17 pm #betul2…orang yg leak ni kerja situ
29 Oct 09 at 1:41 pm #Comment by Mai kat facebook;
hahahaha… nampak benor duduk international sebab pakai kabel. this is the most common problem in ministries nowadays, tak pelikla. tapi lawak tol surat tuh, nak offer tukar seat dgn aku pun tak berbaloi sbb post aku pun kena handle international, so aku cadangkan baik orang tuh pi IDFR or kalu malas sgt pi jaga toilet jerla
29 Oct 09 at 10:02 pm #Comment by Airiza Zakaria;
macam manalah blh lepas time interview ni???
29 Oct 09 at 10:03 pm #Comment by Yus Rezal;
apo ko bondo nyo nih!?
29 Oct 09 at 10:03 pm #Comment by Naza;
i guess dia cuba nak nampak ‘international’ skit dengan menggunakan word yang power power.But then again, sungguh lah tak perlu. It’s better to use simple English tapi betul and orang paham rather than guna ayat tunggang terbalik and kena gelak dek orang je
29 Oct 09 at 10:03 pm #Comment by As Razak;
kesian
29 Oct 09 at 10:04 pm #Saya pernah menulis beberapa entry mengenai writing / using “big” words:
http://blog.aidan.com.my/2009/03/ten-simple-rules-of-writing/
http://blog.aidan.com.my/2009/04/what-is-a-business-plan/
http://blog.aidan.com.my/2009/04/shut-up/
http://blog.aidan.com.my/2009/05/leveraging-our-synergy/
29 Oct 09 at 10:36 pm #other Grammar corrections:
preparation ‘IN’ receiving (still tak betul ayat ni)
29 Oct 09 at 11:00 pm #assist me ‘BY’ providing
food’S’ and beverages
could be reach’ED’ in
if there ‘ARE’ any inquiries
other Word Choice corrections:
1. inquiry - inquiry bermaksud penyiasatan. perkataan yg sepatutnya ialah enquiry. ramai jugak yg confuse ni, especially yg dah biasa dgn American English yg byk guna i berbanding e.
http://www.future-perfect.co.uk/grammartips/grammar-tip-enquiry-inquiry.asp
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_distinction_between_inquiry_and_enquiry
2. revert - actually kesalahan ni boleh dimaafkan, sebab 50% orang Malaysia pun salah guna revert. Wahai rakyat Malaysia! ketahuilah bahawasanya revert tak sama dengan reply. Revert bermaksud ‘menjadi seperti asal’. Reply bermaksud ‘balas’. Tapi tak tau kenapa, kat Malaysia ni, revert digunakan untuk ganti perkataan reply. Suka hati mak bapak korang je.
http://wsu.edu/~brians/errors/revert.html
29 Oct 09 at 11:07 pm #http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/revert
bird pon grammar nazi
29 Oct 09 at 11:40 pm #